As you might know, it's Andrew's birthday.

Therefore, we are running a special contest for a foil Shikamaru's Decision signed by Thomas Cao and myself.

Whoever writes or draws Zero the most heartfelt, loving, tearjerking birthday card and delivers it to him personally via brick through window will win it.

Good luck!

-Josh

Disclaimer: Not an actual contest. Feel free to write Zero a message though, or throw a brick through his window.

Labels: josh, Zero

Boa vinda a today' inspeção prévia de s de seu verdadeiramente na curva perfeita!

Agora com todo o hooting e hollering sobre o Topside, eu figurei I' d adapta e faz today' a inspeção prévia de s realiza duas coisas:

1. Topside can' cópia de t meu ahueaehuaeuhuuaha da revisão

2. It' s gosta de um enigma! Que sorte dos ajustes este cartão.

Porque este cartão, como esta inspeção prévia, confiará no oponente (leitor). Conseqüentemente, eu escondi inteligente 43 indícios durante todo este artigo para lig ao localizador de recurso uniforme para a imagem para este cartão. Aprovação, lá aren' t realmente 43 indícios, mas lá é bastante que o mais inteligente de você deve poder o figurar para fora… apenas como este card' efeito de s. Eu significo, eventualmente eu pude começ furado e apenas dar-lhe mais sugestões … mas… deve ser fácil bastante. It' s não como o vencedor está indo começ Canon Powershot g9 ou qualquer coisa.

Agora, Shikamaru [flexibilidade] era sempre um daqueles cartões que fizeram seu oponente ir " " do dammit do awwwwwww (castores); quando o viram. Se você didn' t tem a resposta, seu oponente apenas sentado lá com um ninja gigantesco do PM para começ BRs livre e para murá-lo o dia inteiro. Mas agora a resposta está em suas mãos… literalmente!

O Shikamaru fixo (etiquetado inteligente " Adaptability") é uma volta mais grande mas força agora seu oponente em fazer um Shikamaru' difícil; decisão de s. Se querem manter sua mão para fazer sob medida acima, a adaptação pune-os jogando o papel do cabo flexível. Se começam duramente carregar ou não usar recursos eficientemente, a terra tem todas as ferramentas para forçar descartes e whatnot para punir aquele.

Quando I' m não sure quanto jogo este cartão verá, it' s sempre uma opção a manter-se na mente quando you' re procurando um cartão que possa indiretamente beneficiar sua plataforma de várias maneiras.

-Josh

Tsu Edit: Always Kill, Never Die huehuehuehue

Labels: josh, previews, Set 24, viva brasil

So those of you who are regular readers of the Bandai forums may have noticed my latest exploration into fiction, the "Oregon SJC Live Coverage" thread (which was basically me posting fake updates every few hours). Eventually, the thread somehow got derailed into an argument about whether AX or GenCon is a harder (real talk: I feel like AX is harder, but only because there is a higher chance of running into the million DBagz at AX vs randoms at GenCon I don't know. There really isn't an appreciable difference either way.).

My initial nonsensical statement got jumped on by a variety of people, so I threw out a vaguely more logical one involving the following "facts:"

1. The population of bads is higher at GenCon than at AX due to the presence of players only interested in promos.
2. The population of bads at GenCon often results in a competent player starting 3-0 with no real difficulty.
3. AX has 7-8 rounds, GenCon has 8 rounds and a T16. Thus the number of wins to top should be 5-6 in AX's case or 6 in GenCon's case.
4. Therefore, AX requires 5-1-1+ whereas GenCon only requires 3-2+, making AX harder.

Now there were some differing opinions from the peanut gallery on how to best attack this argument. Veazie had the brightest idea of going after my credibility, since I remembered 8 rounds at AX when there was only 7. It's an effective strategy in a public forum for sure, but in the end my "argument" allowed for the possibility of 7 rounds - making that line of attack irrelevant in the end. Some less articulate people (names withheld to protect the ignorant) made arguments involving (paraphrasing) "even though you start 3-0," "same number of quality rounds," and something nonsensical involving football. There is a reason Veazie has had more success in children's card games than the unnamed posters. Although he did not attack from the right angle, the path he took was strictly better than trying to meet my argument head on.

You cannot win against my argument on the surface. Let's assume X% of Naruto players are trashcans. Therefore, X% of Naruto players at AX or GenCon will be trashcans. However, GenCon also has people who show up purely for promos (this is the only fact in this argument). Let's label them as Y%. No matter what, GenCon's percentage of trashcans will be higher because it is X+Y% rather than just X%. Therefore, with a similar amount of rounds, GenCon will always be easier than AX since the percentage of bad players is higher.

If you make any argument involving rounds or starting 3-0 or anything of that sort, you have already lost. The math makes it impossible for you to win because of one key fact.

You are fighting on my terms.

The most appropriate argument that topples the house of cards is an attack on basic assumptions. Yes, X% of Naruto players are trashcans. Does that mean they are evenly distributed among locations? Of course not. The assumption that both GenCon and AX will have X% trashcans is inherently flawed. Additionally, the "3-0" assumption isn't even getting close to being backed up by the math I use in the rest of the argument. There would need to be an inordinately high percentage of terrible players to guarantee anything close to a 3-0 or even 2-0 start (although if you are in the top 5% of players at an event, that guaranteed 2-0 start is not a pipe dream assuming you are immensely better than the next 95% - realistically speaking though, there is too much variance in the game for skill to play such a large role). Again, that is an angle of attack that renders an entire key assumption moot.

So what, exactly, does this lengthy anecdote have to do with the card game?

If you are building a rogue deck to attack the defined "best decks" of the format - everything.

It's amazing how many people build their rogue decks to attack the best deck head on and try to fight it at what it does best. I'll give you a hint: that deck is considered the best deck because it is the best at what it does. Fighting against it on its terms is a low percentage strategy that cannot be relied upon to carry you through a multi-round event.

Come ride with me through Naruto CCG history, and I'll show you where deckbuilders fell asleep on the job (and how the smarter people succeeded).

I'm going to gloss over the Fire/Water and Freedori eras, simply because Fire/Water never was oppressively strong and Freedori simply had no equal (Monowater splash Brokages was the best alternative, but it still tried to beat Freedori on its own terms. Tempo sought to attack it from a different angle but was just too inconsistent. Rule #1 of a good rogue deck: make sure your deck is actually a good deck!).

The first real metagame where a clear "best deck" was successfully attacked by a best deck was the Over 9000 metagame. Over 9000 did its thing extremely well: it found Gaara, it protected Gaara, and it buried you in jutsus with a card advantage engine that could not be matched. Many common attempts at rogue decks tried to execute the simplest answer to Over 9K: kill Gaara. It seems simple enough, doesn't it? Deal with Gaara, and the deck has no card advantage engine and no jutsus.

Wrong. The strength of Over 9K was in its draw power - it could easily find multiple Gaaras, especially through the use of ADP + shuffle effects. Additionally, Over 9K players were not stupid - of course they would play cards to protect their key card! By attacking the problem head on, rogue deckbuilders were making decks that failed because they tried to fight on Over 9K's terms. You can not win a jutsu war consistently against O9K.

So what was the right way to win against Gaara? Ignore him. Or rather, make his strengths irrelevant. The same ADP draw engine that so consistently allowed players to find Gaara IP? It also made for a pretty weak early game. Gaara owning you with jutsus? Attack him with Gaara TN outside of the EOJ (thanks to the awesome ninja effect timing rules at the time). Or use an untouchable ninja with a jutsu that can 3 for 1 (Lee HSM + Shadow Clone Jutsu). Or use a ninja that makes 2 other ninjas to soak up 3 jutsus with 1 card (Kakashi AD).

The two decks that most effectively attacked O9K (Hybrid NVS and Dogs) did so by making it so the deck built upon the assumption that draw Gaara = win, didn't actually win when it played Gaara. The second lesson of building rogue decks: if you can find a strategy that bypasses theirs, you are in a hugely advantageous position before the match has even started.

Over 9K later experienced a resurgence as part of the next metagame we are going to examine (the 3rd Sannins), but rather as merely a part of a wide open metagame. This metagame was unique in that it didn't really feature a clear best deck, but rather a bunch of decks that did the same thing. This is because most Naruto players, when faced with a wide open metagame, will return to the familiar formula of 30 decent ninjas, 10 missions, and 10 jutsus. The most basic assumption in the game is: if you can win the key jutsu war, you will win the game. The better players understood this assumption and built their decks for the long term by focusing on components that could help them win that critical jutsu war.

As longtime readers might know, we have an affectionate name for those types of decks around here: "fair" decks.

Fair decks are garbage when we are playing to win.

What's the best thing a fair deck can do? Most likely, make a drop every turn and then unload a hand full of jutsus to wipe the opponent's board. The assumption is, if that happens, they'll be too far behind to recover.

I've explained the thought process behind Greedy.dec many times. Play the most unfair cards possible, play them as early as possible, and draw lots and lots of cards to keep the unfairness coming. The advantage of playing 45 missions and ninjas? You're most likely going to play a mission every turn (besides 0) and a ninja+ every turn. Those missions let you find the ninjas that cheat out more ninjas. Low jutsu count? What does it matter when you have 4 more ninjas in play than your opponent? What if they best-case-scenario you and dump their hand full of jutsus onto the board? Great, they have no hand and we're at par on the board. That means that 1 Concealed Weapon we've been holding is going to hold far more value due to it breaking the stalemate than all the jutsus they've used to reach that point. Again, attack the assumption their deck is built around, not the means they use to accomplish it. The third lesson of going rogue: if what you are doing is inherently more unfair than what your opponent is trying to do, they will have to fight on your terms. And that puts you at a huge advantage.

The next Sannins featured a return to the oppressive "best deck" metagame - Respective Dreams. Dreams seemed like a perfect deck - it could negate its opponents attacks while simultaneously destroying their hand, and could win the game in two quick battle phases with Four Pillars Prison. Additionally, Yamato could blank every single ninja below 5 in the opponent's deck. The most common rogue deck trying to attack this was many different forms of Lightning aggro, and the most egregious example of fighting a battle on the opponent's terms. Ostensibly, the goal of the aggro deck was to take BRs faster than Dreams could take them back.

Hello? You play to win the game! Why are you trying to fight Dreams' strength? Winning BRs against Dreams directly fed its draw engine. Of course there was the occasional game where Lightning just overloaded all the Dreams and Asu/Shikas and First Hokages and whatnot but that was a best case scenario, and that didn't even win all the time. If your best case scenario can't even beat the best deck's middling scenario, what is the point of playing your deck?

The assumption behind Dreams was that as long as it could reach the late game, it would win due to Yamato CBF shutting down everything and its powerful jutsus, as well as the opponent running out of gas from trying to take BRs.

But what if... you never attacked? When I first told Pat and Andrew that our strategy to beat Dreams was to just sit there and do nothing, they laughed (in their credit, they came to understand the reasoning behind it quickly though). But why not? What if Dreams made it to the late game, then came to the realization that the other deck had a more powerful late game? Building up board presence doesn't matter when the other deck can reset you to turn 0 while wiping your board in one turn. You can't win a jutsu war when your opponent's Orochimaru drains your chakra and your draw engine is dependent on an action they absolutely refuse to take (while theirs is independent of anything you do - and can consistently net +'s to make up for your discard). The Dreams deck then gets forced into doing something it is not suited to do: aggro out before the Chidori Stream deck can set up - a difficult role reversal against a deck designed to do exactly what Dreams does, only better! The fourth rule of going rogue: if your deck forces your opponent to change their strategy... blah blah huge advantage etc. Don't be afraid to break the most common assumptions in the game if they give you a better chance at winning.

The last metagame I will analyze in this article is the one from the last Sannins - a return to a more open metagame, as long as you played 3 copies of ANBU in your deck. Of course, there were many different variants of ANBU - True Allies, Attunement/9PD, Rush, etc. All of them, however, harkened back to the assumption of the wide open metagame: the player who can win the key jutsu war will win the game. Or in this case, open up ninja advantage to slowly grind down the opponent through multiple combat phases (due to the presence of so many free drops). And to do this, lots and lots of cards needed to be drawn in order to keep up with the opponent.

And of course, you all know which deck I'm going to point to as the proper solution for the format. The World of Fire God Only Knows played exactly 1 jutsu in a notoriously jutsu heavy format. It played exactly 1 element in a metagame known for crazy multi-element decks due to wide variety of multi-element cards available. And with that, it completely shattered the assumption behind the format because of one key fact - it needed exactly one ninja to win (Furido).

Every single ANBU deck revolved around the combat phase, drawing lots of cards, and removal. TWoFGOK denied the combat phase, turned the opponent drawing cards into a win condition, and didn't care about removal. In fact, by avoiding combat and playing cards like Kiba WF, the deck literally blanked 20% of most decks by making their jutsus useless. Imagine your opponent automatically starting every game with a mulligan, and every 5 turns drawing a dead card. Strategic superiority. Higher percentage.

It turns out even the football argument was somewhat relevant. The current subject of discussion in that surprisingly still unlocked thread is Rob Gronkowski, the tight end for the New England Patriots. As in football, as in card games - the reason for the success of Gronkowski is the same reason for the success of well designed decks: they represent tremendous strategic mismatches. Teams are forced to devote tremendous resources to defending Gronkowski instead of defending their usual comfort zone - they are forced to play on the Patriots' terms.

But it's funny - Gronkowski is tremendously fortunate to be the topic of discussion. For if Lee Evans had been able to hold onto the ball, or if Billy Cundiff hadn't missed such a high percentage kick, we might be talking about how the Ravens defense is such a mismatch for any offensive line. And back in Thomas Cao's first Sannins, if Jeremy had flipped tails on his Double Sand Blade, if Brandon Sherlock hadn't completely punted game 3 away, if Lance hadn't somehow miraculously upset Jerry, and if Joe made the right decision - one of the most well positioned decks of all time might have been remembered as nothing more than a T16 afterthought.

The final lesson: deck construction can only give you a higher percentage. It can never win the game for you. Variance will always play a factor.

But good deck construction? Fortune favors the bold.

-Josh

Labels: josh, ptw

Oh, hello there.

Baby, I think this could be the start of something lovely. And I don't just mean you.

These really are the types of cards I love building around the most - robust, open-ended, tantalizingly beautiful engines just waiting to have all their juicy depths explored and achingly abused and...

Er, sorry. Got carried away there for a moment.

But in all seriousness, this Temari is just begging for a deck to be built around her. Or begging for ahueuhuehuaeuthaeuheuhue...

*ahem*

ANYWAYS.

The first second third fourth fifth sixth thing that came to mind when I saw this card was the deliciously naughty ummm... non-optional effect. Yes, non-optional effect, that's the one.

You mean I can play a card that turns all my jutsus into draw cards?! I love cards! Especially ones that let me draw more and more lovely Temaris!

The kicker, of course, being that all my jutsus have to be negation or do something involving jutsus. This is also, of course, assuming that Bandai erratas all cards that say "Target: 1 jutsu being played" to "Target: 1 jutsu" or rules that only the words "1 jutsu" need to be in the target - otherwise this card is just a tease.

Going into the wayback machine, some of you might remember a Sannin-winning deck nicknamed "Greedy.dec." The point of that deck was to generate massive teams to force the opponent into first action, and massive card advantage to draw the relatively sparse protection present in the deck. But what if... all your protection birthed card advantage for you? Then it wouldn't even be necessary to play so many missions to lube the engine...

Being away from the game for so long has led me to not know what any of the cards in the current block format do, but I've got so many dirty ideas about what to do to with this Temari.

Perhaps a Neo-Greedy.dec using the new puppets, but with a lot more jutsus. Or perhaps...

Yo dawg, I heard you like drawing cards so I put card draw into your card draw so you can... I don't even know how this meme goes. Probably ends with a ferocious punch to the nuts though. (Ferocious Punch with a Temari trigger seems unreal good, in any case)

Or you could play that new X cost Void jutsu and Temari turns it into a Tobi.
Or you could just play this Temari as your 2 drop and then randomly gain value from it as you proceed with your normal plan.
So many different positions are possible... this card is practically squirting with potential.

Now if you'll excuse me, I've got a mess to go clean up.

-Josh

Labels: josh, previews

lol gg

-Josh

Labels: josh, srs bizness

(Since some random Bandai tryhard locked the thread there)

It has come to my attention that the vast majority of the Naruto population is unable to responsibly use the letter G. It is key to understand the power of this letter - chronic overuse will dramatically increase your tryhard quotient, whereas underuse will degenerate you into a total dumpster like Andrew Kardis. There is a target level in-between, both of proper amount of G dropping as well as the level of G drop to apply to the situation. Therefore, I have chosen to create this guide in order to rectify this situation. Please pay proper attention - this is most likely the most important thing you will ever read.

The Classic: GG
Variants: gg, GG?, gg?, ggwp, GGWP
The most basic form of G dropping, and one that should fit your everyday needs. Approved for liberal use. Question marks/WPs are recommended when emphasis on sarcasm/irony is necessary, or a condescending tone is desired.

The Thomas Cao: GFG
Variants: gfg
First introduced to the Naruto community by the legendary Sannin and Kraft Mayonnaise Platinum-level Customer Thomas Cao, GFG adds that little bit of extra "oomph" that the standard GG lacks. The edginess of the GFG means that more controlled usage of it relative to the classic GG is necessary, but it is still appropriate for common usage in everyday speech.

The G Spam: GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
Variants: ggggggggggggggggggggggggg
We now reach the first out of our two high-powered ways to drop Gs. This is the more standard variant, but recent usage trends are troubling in just how standard it has become. Scrubs like Amir Anoobshi, Gary Lawson, and Thomas Veazie take every opportunity to G Spam, reducing the overall power of the G. This is entirely unacceptable - G Spam should only be used where a GG or GFG will not suffice - situations far and few between. Don't be a scrub - save G Spam for when you really need it.

The G String:
G
G
G
G
G
G
G
G
G
Variants:
G

G

G

G

G

G

G

G

G
,

G

G

G

G

(baby baby)
This is the holiest of the holy. The G String should only be used in situations of virtual impossibility, such as Amir winning a Kage or Ari finishing above second in an event with more than 1 player. The more impossible the event is, the more Gs that should be included in the G String. Spacing can be used to enhance the volume of the Gs involved. Additionally, people with knowledge of the most legendary song of all time are authorized to use the baby variant - however, using this variant without requisite knowledge increases one's tryhard level to maximum. Use with caution.

You have now been educated. Please drop Gs responsibly.

-Josh

Labels: Bandai's a joke, GG, josh

G
G
G
G
G
G
G
G
G
G

Biggest troll event in the history of the card game.

-Josh

Labels: Amir's a joke, Bandai's a joke, josh, ujelly.dec

http://steelseries.com/10?code=1l75a5lX <-- :D

-Josh

Labels: help josh win free stuff, josh

+1 for posting "JDragon #1" at the end of all your posts on Bandai.

-Josh

P.S. JDragon #1

Labels: Bandai's a joke, jdragon #1, josh, kids be mad

BR Earth mirror match takes at least that long to finish game 1, thanks.

-Josh

Labels: Bandai's a joke, go Pack go, josh, kids be mad

Well, this is my first preview since Tylar implemented his "preview quality standards" for Set 20. I must say, I have to agree with them. Zero's review of that Deidara was quite unfair to all the potential that card had and was far from comprehensive. With that in mind, let's analyze this lovely preview.

First of all, this card has requirements of an entrance cost of 4 or more. That means you must use a ninja with entrance cost of 4 or more to cast it. Not three! Not two! Four! (Five also works) That means Aoba Yamashiro can't use it, but Arashi Fuma can. This is an important thing to remember if you are running this card in vanilla Lightning.

Secondly, this card targets one ninja on the battlefield. This means that this can only target ninjas on the battlefield. That Sasuke State 2 in your opponent's reinforcement deck? Untargetable. That Zetsu peeking at you from the battle rewards? Untargetable. This is an important thing to remember if your IQ is equal to or lower than Amir Abboushi's.

Next, let's analyze this card's effect. This card gives one damage to the target. This means that it gives exactly one damage to the target. So if their ninja is healthy, it will injure it. If their ninja is injured, it will kill it. This is an important thing to remember if you don't know the rules of the game.

An additional interesting note about this effect is that it has an expert effect! Simply put, this means that if used by the ninja listed in the expert clause (Kidomaru State 2), this card will deal 1 additional damage! This means that it now deals exactly two damage to the target. So if their ninja is healthy, it will kill it. If their ninja is injured, it will kill it. Now even if you are confused about how the game works, just remember to use Fierce Rip with Kidomaru State 2 and the outcome will be the same no matter what. Convenient, huh?

Now originally I thought there was only one ninja that could become an expert of this card (the upcoming State 2 Kidomaru in Set 20). This created an interesting dilemma, as that State 2 Kidomaru requires the sacrifice of a State 1 Kidomaru. Unfortunately, there are currently exactly zero State 1 Kidomarus legal for Block-format play. Don't let this become an obstacle in your quest to become an expert of Fierce Rip however! I recommend the use of a Sharpie to "level up" those pesky State 0 Kidomarus to enable sacrifice. Elite-caliber tournament player protip: if your opponent doesn't catch an illegal game state/your blatant cheating, the game state stands as is. This is important to remember if you are attending a tournament that Alex Bykov or Andy Do is judging.

But professional-level tournament strategy aside, there actually is another Kidomaru that you can use to expertly play this card! N-460 Kidomaru can actually gain the State 2 status simply by being deployed through the use of ambush! Of course, N-460 Kidomaru has the annoying side effect of having that miserable entrance cost of 3, so it can't actually use the jutsu. But with handy cards like N-939 Advisor of the Sand as well as the many cards that turn your ninjas into "Sand" or "Leaf" ninjas, N-460 Kidomaru will be able to fully utilize the capabilities of Fierce Rip. This is important to remember if your primary source of cards is the dumpster behind your local card shop.

Remember, the real American hero GI Joe once said, "Now you know, and knowing is half the battle." Well, pardon me if I plagiarize, but now you know, and knowing is half the battle. Now you too are an "Expert" of Spider Bow: Fierce Rip! I just hope you have an entrance cost of four or more, ha ha ha.

Until next time,
<3 Josh

Labels: josh, previews, Tales of the Gallant Sage

RIP Mr. Giggles, my favorite alt account.

Discuss how mad Tylar is in the comments section.

-Josh

Labels: josh

As I mentioned in my previous article, one of the design issues currently plaguing this game is that of overpowered themes. This is largely a flaw of the individual designer process that Bandai uses - while it might lend more unity to the theme, it also drastically limits the influence of the consensus power level on the individual design.

One way to counteract this lack of a unified power scheme is demonstrated by Magic: the Gathering in its core sets. These sets are comprised mostly of reprints and a few new cards. The unifying theme behind these cards are that they are all fairly general, non-theme-specific cards that could fit into many decks of their color. This allows Wizards of the Coast to "set the tone" of design for the sets while that core set is in the format - the general power level of the format has been defined, designers should not delve too far beyond the bounds of it.

A similar solution could possibly be greatly beneficial to Naruto - like Magic, Naruto is based around a color/element pie. However, unlike Magic, Naruto's is all over the place (for example, Water gets everything...). The creation of a core set would force the designers to actually determine what each element excels at and implement that in their card selection. Then, ideally, the boundaries created by this process would restrict the design of the standard sets so one designers could not irresponsibly destroy the game with an overpowered theme.

Additionally, a core set would allow for the continued presence of utility, "soft engine"-type cards that make the game more fun to play. Cards that enable a diversity of decks or encourage diverse methods of play can only benefit the game, and should be kept in Block format for as long as possible.

To attempt to give more concrete detail of what I'm trying to get across, I'll list some of the cards that I feel warrant inclusion in a core set, and my reasoning for those cards.

(Note that I feel that each non-obscure ninja deserves at least one card in a core set - however, some of the best examples of these ninjas have effects that don't really fit their element. Thus, I have taken the liberty to "element-shift" these ninjas into a different element - a creative possibility that I hope Bandai will explore someday.)

Earth: "He wished for power, but not the strength to wield it."

Ninjas:
Asuma Sarutobi [For the Next Generation]
Choji Akimichi [Infuriation]
Choza Akimichi [As a Father]
Deidara [Plastic Arts]
Hinata Hyuga [Ointment]
Hizashi Hyuga [Why He Chose Death]
Ibiki Morino [First Proctor]
Ino Yamanaka [Easy-Going]
Inoichi Yamanaka [As a Father]
Neji Hyuga [Sealing the Anilities] (hopefully spelled right this time)
Shikaku Nara [As a Father]
Shikamaru Nara [Formation] (Eternal Rivalry)
The First Hokage [Supremacy]
Yamato [Creating a Forest From Underground]
Zetsu [Mysterious Existence]

Jutsus:
Cheating
Concentration
Disguise Jutsu (Coils)
Earth Style: Headhunter Jutsu (PTH)
Earth Style: Rending Piercing Fang
Howl
Knockout Blow (element-shifted)
(I'm having a lot of problem with Earth jutsus - they're either broken or completely trash for the most part - probably need to design some new cards to go here)

Missions:
BBQ
Cursed Fate (ER)
Earth Style: Rampart of Flowing Soil
First Chunin Exam
Hinata in Captivity
Intellectual Strategy (mental power battles one)
Kunoichi Battle
Shogi Match
Tears of Determination (element-shifted)

Earth is about controlling the flow of the game - things like coins on the field, battle rewards, ability to be sent out to battle or in battle, effect text - these are all under Earth's realm. Additionally, Earth is adept at mental power battles and has the ability to protect a lot of ninjas at once. Earth's weakness is that its removal is relatively weak, and has no pure card advantage/filtration.

Fire: "He wished for power, but not the patience to wait for it."

Ninjas:
Akamaru [Partner] (PTH)
Danzo [Hard-Liner]
Fugaku Uchiha [Representative of the Clan]
Genma Shiranui [Encounter Battle]
Haimaru Brothers [Triplets]
Hayate Gekko [Detecting a Plan]
Itachi Uchiha [Despair at the Clan]
Kakashi Hatake [Early Settlement]
Kiba Inuzaka [Man Beast Clone]
Nawaki [12th Birthday]
Ninja Dog Squad (All Gathered) [Howl]
Obito Uchiha [Hidden Strength]
Roshi [Lava Style Ninjutsu]
Sasuke Uchiha [Complete Opening of the Eyes]
The Third Hokage [Addressing Past Wrongs]
Tobi [Man of Mystery] (or whichever one the draw one is)

Jutsus:
Chidori (RnR)
Fear by Genjutsu
Fire Style: Dragon Flame Jutsu (LoL)
Fire Style: Fireball Jutsu (1F, deal 1 damage, next Fireball is free one)
Fire Style: Fireball Jutsu (kill a mission or client)
Lightning Blade (+7/+0 or negate a jutsu)
Mangekyo Sharingan (RFG and -2/-2 coin)
Reaper Death Seal (mill jutsu)
Sharingan Eye (PTH)
Suicidal Action
Tunneling Fang

Missions:
Disaster of the Nine Tailed Fox Spirit (element-shifted)
End of the Mortal Combat
Jonins' Intervention
Lone Avenger
Mission of Capturing the Missing Pet Tora (PTH)
Reconfirmation of the Mission
Shadow in the Moonlight
Stay Out of This!
The Symbol of the Proud Clan
Tsunade's Guess

Fire is the element of destruction - it excels at dealing damage, jutsu and mission negation, and burning cards in the opponent's deck. Its weakness is relatively weak early game options, and no way to efficiently draw cards.

Lightning: "He wished for power, but not the discipline to control it."

Ninjas:
Anko Mitarashi [Chase]
Aoba Yamashiro (vanilla)
Arashi Fuma (vanilla)
Idate Morino [Swift Runner]
Iruka Umino [Reward]
Jiraiya (Childhood) [Shown Signs of the Legends] (element shifted - Lightning only)
Messenger Ninja [Delivery]
Might Guy [Passion]
Naruto Uzumaki [Legacy of the Fourth Hokage]
Naruto Uzumaki [Pervy Sage's Training]
Naruto Uzumaki (Tailed Beast Mode) - the 5 drop one
Rock Lee [Eight Inner Gates] (CotS)
Rock Lee [Eight Inner Gates] (new one)
Sai [Singled Out]
Shion (Awakened) [Seal]
Tenten [Summoning Weapons] (element-shifted)
The Fourth Hokage [Lightning Speed]
The Fourth Hokage (Younger Days) [Savior]

Jutsus:
Leaf Hurricane (reanimation one)
Kunai (PTH)
Multi-Shadow Clone Jutsu (PTH)
Naruto 2K Uzumaki Barrage
Nunchaku
Paper Bomb (Coils)
Rasengan (AW 2L - ping a ninja, if it dies: ping another)
Shadow Clone Jutsu (ER - errata'd: for each 2 cards discarded, the user gets +1/+1 - might still be too strong)
Shuriken (AW)
Unexpected Attack

Missions:
Being a Fool
Box Lunch
Broken Seal (Coils)
Dedication Ceremony
Here Comes Second Test Proctor Anko Mitarashi!
Just Like That Hero (element-shifted to Lightning only)
My Rule
Naruto vs Sasuke
Reaper Death Seal (element-shifted to Lightning only)
Retiring Character
Reunion with the Former Teacher
Tide of the Deadly Combat (element-shifted)
The One Who Lives Within

Lightning is the element of recklessness and resourcefulness. It's capable of generating many resources, but at large costs. It also tends to expend lots of resources at once (such as with big X chakra spells). Lightning is the most aggressive of the elements, and features high-risk, high-reward plays. Cards specific to the element include pump spells, card draw that emphasizes on burning through resources, "swarming" ninjas, getting stronger when injured, and recursion. Lightning's weaknesses are its weak late game and backfiring of its cards.

Water: "He wished for power, but not the wisdom to make use of it."

Ninjas:
Dosu Kinuta [Sonic Impact]
Haku [Creed]
Haku [Face Behind the Mask]
Kabuto Yakushi [Loyal Right-Hand Man]
Kabuto Yakushi [Prominent Medical Skill]
Kidomaru [Elite of the Sound]
Jirobo [Elite of the Sound]
Sakon [Elite of the Sound]
Tayuya [Elite of the Sound]
Kisame Hoshigaki [Cold Blooded]
Orochimaru [Forbidden Jutsu]
Orochimaru (Childhood) [Shown Signs of the Legends] (element shifted - Water only)
Princess Dusk [Wandering Ghost]
Raiga Kurosaki [Funeral of the Living]
Ranmaru [Life as Sensory Organs]
Sasuke Uchiha [Finishing Blow]
Three Tails [A Monster That Lives in the Abyss]
Yoroi Akado [Chakra Absorption]
The Second Hokage [The Hokage Level]
Zabuza Momochi [Bottomless Power]

Jutsus:
8 Trigram Divination Seal Spell Formula (element shifted, errata'd cost WW1, only ninja battling against user)
Fast Capture
Four Flames Formation (RnR)
Hidden Mist Jutsu (PTH)
Twin Snake Sacrifice Jutsu
Summoning Jutsu: Reanimation (RnR)
Water Prison Jutsu (PTH)
Water Style: Five Hungry Sharks
Water Style: Giant Vortex Jutsu (PTH - errata'd cost to WWWW)

Missions:
Assassination of the Kazekage
Bashfulness (element shifted)
Bingo Book
Flash Back
Gato Transport
Ghost Panic
Huge Difference in Ability
Ninja Info Card
The End of the Demon
Threat of the Tailed Beast (errata'd - 2 instead of 3)
Tragic Destiny (errata'd - Water only)
(a new card - some tutor for a 5 or 6 drop)

Water is the element of overwhelming power. Water's high drop ninjas are the strongest in the game, and it has the ability to both find them and protect them. It also has unique chakra control capabilities. Additionally, Water specializes in non-permanent removal - its removal bounces to either the hand or the deck, and its negation treats jutsus the same way. Water's weakness is that its card filtration only allows it to find ninjas, and its early game is the weakest in the game.

Wind: "He wished for power, but not enough."

Ninjas:
Baki [Cleaning Up]
Black Ant [Lifeless Warrior]
Chiyo [Retired Master]
Crow [Lifeless Warrior]
Ebisu [Repeated Defeat]
Gaara of the Desert [Conversation]
Gaara of the Desert [Reliance]
Gen Aburame [As a Father]
Kankuro [An Audacious Grin]
Katsuyu [Healer]
Kurenai Yuhi [Wits and Beauty]
Moegi [Rookie of the Leaf]
Sakura Haruno [A Double Personality]
Sakura Haruno [Reliance]
Sasori [Legendary Puppet Creator] (errata'd to have ambush)
Shino Aburame [Insect Warriors]
Shizune [Medical Kunoichi]
Shukaku (the new one)
Temari [Wind Charmer]
Temari [Gale Warning]
The Fifth Hokage [Establishment of Medicine]
Tsunade (Childhood) [Shown Signs of the Legends] (element-shifted - Wind only)

Jutsus:
Cliff-Climbing Training
Carrier Kite
Concealed Weapon
Coordination
Iron-Armed
Sand Cocoon (the new one)
Sealing Jutsu: Breaking the Lion's Roar
Secret Red Move: Performance of a Hundred Puppets
Wind Blade (errata - discard a ninja battling against the user)
Wind Scythe Jutsu (CotS)
Wind Style: Great Breakthrough
Unguarded Moment

Missions:
Arbitration
Barrier Preparation
Entrustment
Loss
Pass Permit
Puppet Fight: 10 vs 100!
Rules for Medical Ninja (element shifted - Wind only)
Sakura's Decision
Substitute

Wind is the element of serenity. Its card advantage/filtration is clean and doesn't come with the messy conditions and drawbacks of other elements. Its jutsus focus on wiping the board clean without any contingencies. As an element, Wind's strong points are its card advantage, ability to heal, and strong teams. Its weaknesses are that it has a lower overall power level (to counteract its drawing power) and while it is good at many things, is not exceptional at any. While this might lend itself to a role as solely a supporting element, its best jutsus are all extremely heavy on the Wind requirements - encouraging a Wind-heavy deck.

Multi-Element (incomplete right now):

Ninjas:
Naruto Uzumaki and Gaara of the Desert
Naruto Uzumaki and Shikamaru Nara [Reasonable Choice]
Sasuke Uchiha and Orochimaru [3 Years Later]

Missions:
Capture
Make-Out Tactics
Narrow Escape
Selecting the Strongest
The 9th Match

Squads:
Sasuke Uchiha and Orochimaru [Ambition and Desire]
Shikamaru Nara and Choji Akimichi [Leaf's Uncowed Elite]
Shino Aburame and Kiba Inuzaka [Reunion]

Clients:
Emina
Futaba
Sandayu Asama

This core set still needs some work (more Earth cards for example, and balance testing) but I think it gets across the general idea of what I'm trying to convey. Elements should define the themes - not the other way around.

-Josh

Labels: core set, design, josh, theory

Card advantage is king.

Yeah, I know - coming from the guy who used to start each decklist "3 Sakura's Decision," this is hardly a surprising statement. And given that this writer hasn't played Naruto since Sakura's Decision was actually legal, certain elements among us would dismiss that statement as the deluded theories of some crazy old man blind to the metagame where a deck can function with no hand.

But it's the truth!

Look at the current metagame - the format is dominated by a clear best deck (No-Hand Water) and two close contenders (BR Earth and True Allies). There are other fringe decks, such as Dogs and Mental Power - but none of them are really close to being better than the top three decks.

We'll get back to this metagame in a moment.

In card games, there are two different types of card advantage engine design: hard engines and soft engines. Hard engines are those that are strictly created by the designers to fit into one archetype - stuff like the Blackwing continuous search spell in Yu-Gi-Oh, the Ally card-drawer in M:tG, Karin in Naruto. Card game designers should be careful when creating these - as the synergies emphasized by a designed theme can quickly become overpowered relative to the power levels of independent cards.

Soft engines are cards or sets of cards that fit into many different archetypes. Often labeled "staples," these cards are usually generic draw or filtration, or card advantage with an easily met condition. These cards are best at enabling several different types of strategy - most often, ones that aren't hard-designed into the game. Examples of soft engines include cards like Pot of Greed or Graceful Charity in Yu-Gi-Oh, Ancestral Recall or Thirst for Knowledge in Magic, and Sakura's Decision or Shadow Clone Jutsu (Eternal Rivalry).

That last example (SCJ) might be a little bit of a surprise to some of you - how, you might ask, does a pump spell equate to card advantage? The key here, is the enabler role that soft engines often play. SCJ could equate to pure card advantage for decks such as Chain Lightning, which relied on the graveyard as another resource to make up for the otherwise card-inefficent nature of Lightning. SCJ could equate to virtual card advantage for decks such as Hybrid NVS, which relied on the threat of SCJ to force through a swarm of ninjas - and were the opponent to block, could trade SCJ for sometimes as many as 3 of an opponent's ninjas.

To look at another example, Sakura's Decision has been used throughout Naruto CCG history to enable everything from Tide of the Deadly Combat to Gaara IP to Puppets to even Chidori Stream.

However, that Gaara IP example in the last sentence should give you pause - for that is exactly the problem with hard engines. Not only can they take advantage of the natural card advantage engines given to them by the designers, but they can also employ the enablers that all the non-theme decks use. However, Gaara IP was kept in check due to the fact that the entire engine relied on one ninja - a fatal weakness in many instances. Thus, in order to maintain a diverse play environment, the designer-created themes should be limited in power level to keep them in line with what is possible with non-spoonfed decks, right?

Well, the current metagame lends credence to that thought. What we have right now is an example of hard engines run amok. Look at all the top decks - all three of them are Bandai-designed monstrosities. Sakura's Decision? That card was your father's card - an elegant weapon for a more... civilized time. As for now, it's just a brawl between different Bandai designers over who can create the most overpowered theme.

The trouble with the current themes is that the card advantage generated by their hard engines is just too easy. For No-Hand Water, the advantage comes in generating chakra while dumping the player's hand away - a task easily accomplished by a number of cards (the largest offender being the incredibly overpowered Suigetsu's Joy). And once the No-Hand Water player dumps his or her hand (again, not very hard of a task at all), he or she gains access to any number of mega-powerful effects at little to no cost. For example, take Tayuya - if another ninja had the exact same effect but without the hand requirement, what would the turn cost be? Judging by the existence of Cautiousness Yamato, it'd have to be a turn 5+ with a hand cost at least. Yet Water gets access to Tayuya on turn 2 (with ambush!). It's the same with Karin - what would the cost be of a ninja that both instantly draws you a card, but also lets you draw a card whenever you play a card? I'm thinking at least 7 would be the turn cost, as it's definitely a game-ending effect. Yet Water gets access to this effect on turn 1 - for simply turning on its card advantage engine!

For BR Earth, the advantage comes in simply allowing the opponent to attack. Each BR taken back (again, an incredibly easy task due to the opponent being forced to attack to win, as well as the cards provided by Bandai) is not only card draw, but also life gain (rendering the resources spent by the opponent in achieving those BRs useless). Thus, the theory behind the deck Thomas and I played at GenCon (when the very similar Dreams deck ruled the format) - there is no reason whatsoever to allow Dreams to get its massive card advantage off taking back BRs. So how do we win without taking BRs? Don't attack at all until the game is locked up with Chidori Stream (and the opponent on turn 0)! Not attacking until after an inordinate amount of turns - does that even sound like a healthy metagame? While BR Earth is not quite as powerful as Dreams, it too has the same degenerate effect upon the metagame. And it has the same reason for being overpowered: card advantage comes too easy, in a form available only to that particular archetype.

And finally, for True Allies, the advantage comes in simply drawing or tutoring for a Sakura [True Allies]. Once you get that first piece, the rest of them come - and then it's endless card advantage for as long as you can keep the True Allies alive. True Allies is the closest thing to a soft engine amongst the top three decks, as you can fit many different types of decks into a True Allies shell. In fact, without No-Hand Water or BR Earth, we could be seeing a metagame entirely based off of True Allies variants (sort of like the Destiny Hero days of Yu-Gi-Oh). While that may be relatively preferable compared to the current metagame, it's still unwise to have a subset of cards creating a soft engine powerful enough to force inclusion in virtually every deck.

It's alright to design themes - in fact, Bandai has been doing them correctly in the past. Decks like Animals, Puppets, Taijutsu - these were all decks with their own hard engines that have historically done well, but not been overpowered whatsoever. But right now, with the system of design being one person responsible for an element... it's only natural to attempt to create an overarching theme within that element. However, as we are seeing at the moment, this is not necessarily a good thing. Sure, the element may have a cleaner, more linear feel overall... but at what cost? With an entire element positioned around mostly one theme, there becomes no reason to play anything but that theme - after all, that's how the game is designed. Deck design becomes less of searching for various puzzle pieces strewn throughout various sets, and more of taking the latest Bandai-designed deck out of the box and playing with it.

You know, I wish I could say something positive - like I've found the soft engine answer to a broken format (sort of like NVS in the 9K metagame and Chidori Stream in the Dreams metagame)... but I just don't see it happening. There needs to be a whole slew of cards put on the rogue list, as well as wholesale changes in the mindset of Bandai's designers, before the spoonfed theme decks stop dominating the metagame.

-Josh

Bonus Section: Turning Water into Whine

Banned:
Karin
Tayuya
Kabuto DB
Suigetsu's Joy
Sasuke State 2

These are the cards that give Water its ridiculous power - without these, I feel it becomes a much more fair deck. Of course, then Earth and TA might need to be hit... but that's the problem when the metagame is dominated by overpowered hard engines.

Labels: josh

My San Francisco Giants are the World Series Champions.

A collection of has-beens and never-beens (carried by the best pitching in the league)... world champions!

-Josh

Labels: josh

It is currently 12:50 AM. I am in St. Charles, Illinois, and I am in full-on card game mode.

Not that my current situation has anything to do with card games – I’m actually about to start the nationwide training for my new job. It’s just that for as long as I can remember, I’ve always been unable to sleep before tournaments because I’m so excited. So to force myself to sleep, I stay up for an entire night so I crash the night before the event. So excited that I can’t sleep? That’s card game mode.

I think it’s a testament to my sad state of affairs that I’m getting excited about training, but c’est la vie.

In any case, the reason I’m writing this article is because I read Pat’s article about obsession on Bandai, and it inspired me to write the one article I’ve been putting off forever. You know, the one where I reveal all my secrets at how to become amazing at children’s card games. The tell-all where I bare my soul and let you, my dear readers, into the deepest recesses of my mind. The one where I alienate half the Naruto community through brutal honesty and egomania.

No really, this is that article. I’m going to go ahead and warn you right now: this article really doesn’t have a point. It’s just me rambling on and writing about whatever comes to mind as I retell my long journey.

---

Like anything else, it all starts with obsession. There are many words for it… the desire to be great, drive, the Fire… whatever you want to call it, the point is that I once had it – and now I don’t. Is that something I regret? Not really. Do I wish I could turn it on again? Sometimes.
But the one thing you must know about obsession is: if you want to get better, you must embrace it. Nothing comes without hard work. It’s a fact of competition: there will always be someone better. And if you want to get better, never let anyone convince you otherwise. The moment you become complacent, someone with stronger desire is going to take your place.

When I first started playing this game seriously, there was one thing that drove me – I hated losing. For those of you who are familiar with me from playing in events, you’re well aware of the fact that very rarely is there ever not a smile on my face – even after a loss. I deeply enjoy playing card games and interacting with the community, and I still maintain that’s the only force that should be greater than your obsession – if it ever becomes not fun, then there’s no reason to continue to try to get better at a chore. But tangent aside, even though I still have a smile after losing – inwardly, I’m completely livid. That’s one thing that’s stayed with me throughout my entire career.

In one of the first few events I played in, I lost to John Forlanda, the man known to the world as darkpotato. And I was pissed – not just because I lost, but because I knew I was a better player than him. After that loss, I forced myself to choose – either I start taking this game seriously so I won’t ever have to lose to someone worse than me again, or I quit and go back to Magic.

Obviously, I chose the former. For a period of time, I went to every single event I could go to. Every weekend, I’d travel to two or three different tournaments just so I could get better and better. I didn’t really care about the prizes – for those months, it was all about improving. People online questioned the win-loss ratio that GRT showed – there was no way that could be real, they claimed. But I am here to tell you now – my record was very real. During that span of time, I did lose a few games – once to Vit Ratipat in the finals of the very first Genin in the area, one or two to Thomas Cao – but those were the losses that sustained and drove me for months on end to get better. And the first time I sat down across the table from John Forlanda and saw fear in his eyes – I knew that I had already won the game – and that I was making progress.

---

I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past
I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.

I’ll admit it freely – I didn’t play in the first Jonin at GenCon SoCal because I was afraid of losing. Even though I had regularly dominated events in my area for quite a while at this point, I knew I was still making mistakes and not playing perfectly. And being a longtime Magic player, I was well aware of the local hero syndrome – someone smashes through their locals on a consistent basis, then gets absolutely crushed in a large-scale event because they had only played against subpar competition. Somehow, I managed to convince myself that I wasn’t legitimately good at all.

I should have known better. The players at that first event were largely terrible. Doing the coverage for the event, I saw horrible play after horrible play. I might not have been perfect, but the players who ended up making the top cut were nowhere even close to my level. The lesson in this fiasco? Never let fear override your obsession. If you truly want to get better, you should never be afraid of losing, and never, ever be afraid of playing against people better than you.

---

A few months after that, the first local Jonin finally rolled around (Fanime). And this time, there was no way I was going to pussy out. I had learned my lesson from SoCal – there’s an infinite array of what-if scenarios you can use to scare yourself – but once you start playing, it’s just your skill versus your opponent’s skill.

And as fate would have it, my first opponent in the top cut was my old nemesis, the dark potato himself. To compound this destined battle, I was in a terrible mental state. The prior day, my backpack containing my entire collection had been stolen – the deck I was playing with had been constructed out of borrowed scraps from friends, and I had not gotten any sleep whatsoever. And John knew this.

But when I looked into his eyes, I didn’t see a shred of confidence. When he spoke, I heard nothing but excuses – “I’m happy with making top 8. I don’t care if I lose.” And right then, I knew I had won the match already.

The same thing happened in my top 4 match. And in the top 2, I finally found an opponent who could actually play on equal ground with me – Thomas Cao. I took game 1. He took game 2. And in game 3, after a mulligan to 4, I further solidified my legend of being able to pull completely lost games out of my ass.

---

That seems to be a gift I have – I call it playing to my outs, other people (notably one Mr. Andrew Kardis) call it sacking. But it happens consistently every event I play in – there’s always some match where it looks completely hopeless but I hang on and stick around and somehow scrape out a miraculous win.

Even when he was getting pounded into the ground, he never stopped planning his next move. He never lost his faith in his ability to win. Naruto knows instinctively that believing in yourself gives you the power to change your destiny.

One of my favorite fights of the actual Naruto series has always been Naruto vs Neji in the Chunin Exam Arc. And I think this quote is very representative of the philosophy I try to apply to my card game matches. It’s hard enough having your opponent trying to beat you – don’t make it two vs. one by going on tilt. Always have a plan in your mind of how to achieve victory, no matter how improbable that victory may seem. Don’t just give up because the situation looks bad.

One of the few times I can remember completely going on tilt was at the Anime Expo Jonin following my Fanime Jonin victory. While I finished respectably, going 5-2 and missing top cut on tiebreakers, I never was mentally in any of the games I played until I had already picked up two losses (after which I resolved not to embarrass myself further – and the difference was obvious when I wasn’t on tilt. Before, I was making the most retarded plays imaginable. After I pulled myself together, I was beating turn 1 Kakashi ES/Baki off of JI two games in a row).

---

I finished off that season with a decent finish, finishing 3rd at Sannins and proving myself an elite player – however, as you should very well know by now, a finish that I was nowhere near satisfied with. I didn’t want to just be an elite player – I wanted to be the best.
I figured I was on my way after the pre-GenCon tournament season I had 2008. I felt like my NVS variant I had played to 2nd and 1st place finishes at Fanime and AX was the best deck in the format – and not only that, I was incredibly comfortable with it. I had logged countless playtesting hour with the deck and was confident in it to win from any situation possible (as an added bonus, the deck prominently featured Unexpected Attack – the card representing the defining moment of the Naruto vs Neji fight).

Additionally, it wasn’t just in Naruto that I felt like I was the best player in the world. In Bleach, I had designed a deck that was broken beyond belief (the infamous Ban and Ho) and also had played over a hundred playtesting matches with it. The craziest thing about that? In all those playtesting matches, I had to yet to lose a single game (except versus the carbon copy mirror match).

And as if to further prove it was my year of destiny, I was heading to Indy without needing to pay a dime – my plane flight was paid by Bandai, my hotel was free because of numerous accumulated points, and my badge was a press badge courtesy of PlayTCG.

Around a month before GenCon, my parents told me that my mom’s colon cancer had relapsed – and not only that, it had metastasized to her liver. She was given less than six months to live.

The next day, I canceled my flight to Indianapolis.

---

Fanime 2009 rolled around, and for the first time in a long while, I was playing Naruto again. For the past year, I had focused as much as possible on spending time with my mom and making her happy. I had taken that fire that once burned within me for card games and applied to what we would term “real life.” And somehow, miraculously, mom was doing the impossible. She was beating the death sentence of metastasized cancer. Her endless optimism and will actually pushed the cancer back into remission by the time I stepped into the San Jose Convention Center that May.

But my journey through those doors – that was difficult. It was my junior year of college, and all the accounting majors were applying for internships. I was at the top of my class – nothing but As in all the accounting classes, and that doesn’t even begin to describe how far ahead I was. In classes where the average exam grades ranged around the mid 40s, and the second-highest score was somewhere in the 70s – I was getting 98s and 100s. I didn’t even have to work hard and I was at the top academically. An internship at one of the prestigious “Big 4” accounting firms was practically guaranteed with my accomplishments.

I didn’t get a single offer from any of the 13 accounting firms I interviewed with. From the Big 4 to the smallest of the local firms, I was rejected by every single one. This hurt worse than losing to random scrubs in card games. This was my future. My resume sucked. My interview skills were atrocious. I desperately applied to endless numbers of companies. Nothing but rejection followed. At some point, I lost count of how many times I had received the, “We’re sorry…” e-mail.

But in early May, I finally broke through. I got a corporate finance internship position I was immensely overqualified for – but it didn’t matter… I had a job, and mom was on the road to recovery.

---

Of course, with all that energy spent on real life, I hadn’t really bothered to invest much of myself into card gaming. And it reflected in my results – while I did put together some 3rd place finishes in the Fanime and AX Jonins, as well as 1st/2nd place finishes in Dragonball and crossover, at this point I was basically skating by on pure talent alone. I barely knew what most of my cards did, and I didn’t really care that much.

At Indy 2009, when I finished 5-1-2 and out of the top cut for the first time since over 2 years prior, I realized I wasn’t even that mad at myself. I was just happy to be there. I recognized that my window of opportunity for dominance of the game was probably over, but it didn’t matter that much to me. I had picked up another year of hanging out with the greatest group of friends in the world, as well as another seasons’ worth of ridiculous comeback stories.

But the obsession was gone, and with it, my proficiency at the game. I knew my skills were slowly degrading with each missed playtesting opportunity. Whereas previously I had sometimes played in 3 events per weekend, now I was playing in 3 events a year.

---

At the beginning of the school year, my mom’s cancer came back. This time, it had metastasized into the bloodstream and lungs. The results of the scan of her lungs was the most depressing, soul-crushing image I’ve seen in my entire life. All over the picture were tiny pinpricks of white – each another tiny tumor, growing with the speed that only cancer can grow at. And worse, now this cancer was resistant to chemotherapy – and no amount of surgery would be able to remove all of it.

Obviously, the prognosis was even worse this time around – 3 months, the doctor said – if you’re lucky.

It wasn’t supposed to happen like this.

She was supposed to have grandchildren.

She was supposed to be there at my wedding.

She was supposed to see me go to work at my first real job.

She was supposed to watch my graduation.

I wanted, with all of my heart, for her to be proud of me.

---

I realized that I had very little margin for error. There was to be no more slacking off if I wanted to accomplish my goal. For the first time in my life, it wasn’t a question of how much effort, how much obsession was necessary. Instead, it was a question of whether my obsession would be enough.

---


“Tell me,” the interviewer asked. “What’s your strongest trait?”

“Well,” I answered, “whatever I do, I always apply my passion towards it… you could almost call it an obsession for constantly improving myself and getting better. In fact, let me tell you about one of my hobbies, this card game I play…”

---

That night, the partner who interviewed me called me.

“We were really impressed with your interview today, especially what you told us about your passion for what you do. That’s exactly what we look for in our candidates. We’d like to extend an offer…”

---

That fall, I finished the final class required for my accounting major. But the hunger to do even more still burned within me.

This June, I graduated summa cum laude with a triple major in accounting, finance, and information systems. As soon as the commencement ceremony finished, I dashed out to find my mom and give her a great big hug.

---

Three weeks before GenCon, my mother passed away. She had battled for four years against cancer, and outlived her initial prognosis by three.

Before she went, she told me she was so proud of me, especially of how mature I had become over the past two years.

---

Three days before GenCon, I left for the airport. It was the first time in my 10 years of playing competitive card games that my mom hadn’t been there to wish me luck as I left.

---

During GenCon, I “played to my outs” many, many times.

Thanks, mom.

---

Of course, I really wish I wasn’t such an idiot and actually read over my cards… but that’s always been my problem, hasn’t it? Brilliant plays one game, completely boneheaded errors the next. That’s just been my style for these four years.

And when, to-night,
I enter Christ's fair courts, and, lowly bowed,
Sweep with doffed casque the heavens' threshold blue,
One thing is left, that, void of stain or smutch,
I bear away…
My panache.

---

It is currently 4:30 AM. I am in St. Charles, Illinois, and I have just finished writing about 4 years of card games.

Card games have everything to do with why I’m here. In four hours, I begin my training for Ernst and Young – perhaps the most prestigious out of the Big 4 accounting firms.

Labels: josh, life

Year	Wins	Losses	Draws	Win%	AWin%	Pt%	Top Cuts	Events	Top%	EWins
2007	24	3	1	85.7%	88.9%	86.9%	2	3	66.7%	1
2008	17	1	1	89.5%	94.4%	91.2%	2	2	100.0%	1
2009	18	5	4	66.7%	78.3%	71.6%	2	3	66.7%	0
2010	8	1	2	72.7%	88.9%	78.8%	1	1	100.0%	0
Lifetime	67	10	8	78.8%	87.0%	82.0%	7	9	77.8%	2

W/L/D takes into account top cut matches
AWin% = not including draws
Pt% = amount of total possible points achieved
EWins = Event Wins

I have an Excel file with all the formulas done already if anybody wants it to plug their own numbers into.

-Josh

Labels: boredom, I'm Asian so I'm good with numbers, josh

Or There and Back Again, a short novella dedicated to my ego.

4 of us made the trip from sunny California to just-a-bit-too-sunny Indianapolis - ex-mothafucking Sannin Thomas Cao, alcoholic bad player Mike Alpers, token black guy WillieG, and your beloved hero... me!

Building on my past experience from last year, where our layover in Las Vegas had resulted in the loss of our hotel money to Thomas Cao's gambling habit, we decided to take the much safer route of booking a flight with a layover in Milwaukee. I mean, it's Wisconsin. Absolutely nothing can go wrong in Wisconsin, unless you are wearing a Brett Favre jersey.

Aside: speaking of Wisconsin, if anybody finds my Respective Dreams deck (black Dragonball deckbox) at Gate 41B of the Milwaukee airport, I would appreciate it back. Thank you very much.

In any case, we made it to Indianapolis on Wednesday morning, picked up our badges, and then proceeded to rampage through a local K-Mart in search of food to stock the hotel for the weekend. I have never seen a sadder cashier in my life than the young lad who was confronted the sight of our mega-mountains of frozen food and alcoholic beverages.

30 minutes of scanning and a total of just over $100 later (or, approximately $0.03 per pound of food)...

*fast forward through boring bits*

Midway through those boring bits, new challengers had arrived in the form of first class noob and all-around ginger Nick Botchis, ultra-noob Pat O'Neill, and king of the noobs Andrew Kardis. Luckily for them, they had arrived bearing offerings of Smash Bros. and Wii and so were allowed to prostrate themselves in the temple of me.

We ended up cubing (so much fun, btw - every group should have someone with a cube) and I felt so sorry for Alpers that I graced him with a victory in the finals. Considering this was the one and only time that he had ever won anything in his entire life, I decided I had done enough good deeds for the day and disemboweled a kitten before heading to sleep.

zzz...

zzzzzzzz...

zzzzzzzzzzzz...

Crono! Wake up!

zzz....

My electric travel razor doesn't work! Curse you and your inferior products Remington!

(That was why I was unshaven the whole weekend, in case anyone cares.)

*fast forward through more boring parts*

We partook in a variety of adult beverages on Thursday night - vodka and Sierra Mist, vodka and cranberry juice, vodka and coke, vodka and diet coke, and of course, Thomas Veazie's favorite of vodka and vodka.

Pop quiz!

What did Pyrot do/say while drunk in our hotel room?
A. Attempt to hook up with Alpers.
B. *in high pitched girly voice* "Woah! Laurent! You're... BLACK!" *extends fist* "Knuckles?"
C. Attempt to gift various members of our hotel room with an iPod touch, his virginity, and a small quantity of weed (ironically stored in a Naruto deckbox).
D. Drink all of our vodka, the fucker.
E. Get punched out by Amir (lol).
F. All of the above.

If you answered anything but F, you're an idiot.

*fast forward through fuzzy parts*

Watching Pat play Blazblue drunk against a completely sober Andrew was hilarious. The amount of Jack Daniels left in Pat's cup corresponded inversely with the savagery of the annihilation he was dishing out to Andrew. By the time he had none left he was perfect-ing Andrew in 3 seconds flat. Drunken fist ftw?

*fast forward through parts not for public consumption*

I ordered the same thing at Steak and Shake the 4 times we went there over the weekend (Western BBQ Bacon Double Steakburger) - it got better each time.

...

Plus: getting humped by Ari's girlfriend
Minus: getting humped by Ari

...

If you would like to hear someone rage more than Thomas Cao using Multi-Shadow Clone Jutsu, please ask Andrew Kardis about his experiences in 2HG MTG Draft at GenCon.

...

Dude, I swear I thought it was a Negate.

...

Oh, the actual tournament. Because nobody actually likes reading about matches, I have condensed each game into one sentence.

Round 1 - Kelvin Smith - ANBU
Game 1: Sealing Barrier on Dispatch elicits the insta-scoop.
Game 2: No Sealing Barrier, I insta-scoop.
Game 3: Time is called when I have 9 BRs and a Sasuke/Oro + Sasori/Deidara, and he has 0 BRs, 0 cards in hand, and 0 ninjas in play.

1-0 (SoCal players faced: 1)

Round 2 - Juan Romero - Taijutsu
Game 1: Chidori Stream!
Game 2: Chidori Stream (after a mulligan to 4)!

2-0 (SoCal players faced: 2)

Round 3 - Colin Mitchell - Dreams
Game 1: Lots of yelling, and he sacks the shit out of me.
Game 2: I sack the shit out of him (after attempting to ambush a platoon - this is what happens when you don't play the game for a year).

In all fairness, I was, as Zero puts it, "playing to my outs."

2-0-1 (SoCal players faced: 2)

Round 4 - Mynor Del Aguila - Taijutsu
Game 1: Chidori Stream!
Game 2: I get buttfucked.
Game 3: Snake Waves!

3-0-1 (SoCal players faced: 3)

Round 5 - Nick Brady - Earth
Game 1: Chidori Stream (eventually)!
Game 2: I am the Prince of Persia!

4-0-1 (SoCal players faced: 3)

Round 6 - Steve Aragon - Dreams
Game 1: Pillars! Pillars! Pilla- oh wait, I died.
Game 2: You can't miss drops against the Prince of Persia and expect to win.

4-0-2 (SoCal players faced: 4)

Round 7 - Michael Cano - Dreams
Game 1: Chidori Stream!
Game 2: Sasori/Deidara!

5-0-2 (SoCal players faced: 5)

Round 8 - Joe Colon - TBM Earth
Game 1: I Sealing Barrier his Yamato, which lets me set up for... Chidori Stream!
Game 2: I mulligan to Oro, Oro, mission, mission, and proceed go: drop, drop, drop, Oro, Snake Waves on time.

This "playing to your outs" thing is pretty effective.

Saul: "Hey Josh, how does it feel to have god licking your ballsack?"

6-0-2 (SoCal players faced: 5 out of 8 rounds)

...

We go to some horrible wings place and watch Anderson Silva get the shit beaten out of him (and not care) for 23 minutes, only to make the other guy tap out in the 24th minute. Best fight ever.

...

Top 16 - Ari Kathein - Concentration Water
Game 1: Chidori Stream! Oh wait, he's not dead... Chidori Stream!
Game 2: Snake Waves! ...holy shit Ari, what is with you and not dying to game-ending jutsus? Chidori Stream!

Ari bestows upon me the title of "Master of Water." He also mentioned someone else, but I don't really care about them.

Top 8 - Mike Cancelleri - OneWingedToads

Ok, fine, I'm going to go longer on a sentence in this one. But that's because I made my only good play of the tournament in this game.

Game 1: I get a Sasori in play while getting beaten down by turn 2 Gamabunta. I know he has a Shika U in his hand after seeing it with Temari WS, so I organize a Shino into Sasori's team with my only ninja being a bug coin. He takes the bait and deploys Shika U, uses it on my Shino, then organizes into Naruto Reliance/some random 1 drop, Gamabunta/Lee, Choji/Shino, ShikaU/bug coin. I give him some BRs, then Invasion for Freezing Eyes, ambush it, activate Sasori, hard charge to give me more chakra than him, organize, activate the squad...

Boom!

His 1 card in hand was not enough to make a comeback.

Game 2: I see Oro/Snake Waves in my opener. He doesn't get Bunta out on turn 2.

Top 4 - Thomas "Knuckles" Veazie - Dreams
Game 1: Tragic Destiny does WHAT?!
Game 2: I go all in with my trips Stream and trips Wind Scythe. Unfortunately, there is only one person playing poker at this table, and it isn't him.

I put the same curse on him that I put on Brandon Thieben 3 years ago and he draws horri-bad in the finals and loses. Revenge?

Mmmmm... noodles...

They really need one of those places in Cali.

We go to the arcade and Mike Alpers tells me he's good at MvC2. I have never played in my life. I beat him by repeatedly slamming my hand down on all 6 buttons at once.

Victory!

I also crush Andrew 7-1 in air hockey but fail to draw Snake Waves against Joe and lose my air hockey king title. I blame my ignominious defeat on button-mashing related fatigue.

Back to the hotel, more cubing...

THERE ISN'T ANY BOOZE FOR SALE IN INDIANAPOLIS ON SUNDAY. EPIC FAIL.

Monday was mostly Fogo de Chao and raging.

Overall, not a bad way to go out.

...

Hello Hello (Good to be Back)

3 Sea Monstah [Monstah of the Sea]
2 Anko Mitarashi [Pupil of Orochimaru]
2 Cursed Warrior [Ubiquitousness]
2 Shino Aburame [Insect Warriors]
1 Sakura Haruno [A Double Personality]
1 Kiba Inuzaka [Keen Nose]

3 Temari [Wind Scythe]
1 Kabuto [Database]

3 Konohamaru Ninja Squad [Successors to the Will of Fire]
1 Shino Aburame [Silence]

2 Orochimaru (Childhood) [Shown Signs of the Legends]
1 Naruto Uzumaki [Reliance]
1 Sakura Haruno [Reliance]

1 Sasuke Uchiha [Severing the Bond]
1 Sasuke Uchiha [Freezing Eyes]

1 Sasori [Creating the Masterpiece]

3 The Second Hokage [Supremacy]
1 Sasuke Uchiha and Orochimaru [3 Years Later]

3 Sakura's Decision
3 Loss
2 Invasion of Akatsuki
1 Sealing Barrier
1 The Next Target
1 Tragic Destiny

3 Chidori Stream
3 Wind Scythe Jutsu

3 Tobi [Man of Mystery]

Sideboard:
1 Shino Aburame [Insect Warriors]
1 Shino Aburame [Parasite]
1 Kigiri [Smoke Screen]
1 Shimon Hijiri [Keeping an Eye]
2 Yakumo Kurama [With a (Sea) Monstah Within]
2 Make-Out Tactics
1 The Next Target
1 Ten Thousand Snake Waves

Labels: Gencon, josh, reports

Your jutsus, that is.

Meh.

Not sure exactly what sort of impact this card will have - if you're not playing a jutsu based deck, it protects you for a few turns to try to force the game into an unwinnable position for your opponent... but wouldn't it be better to just play cards that actually do something? I mean, even if there's some sort of pump jutsu deck, this card comes out too late to actually do much for your early game against that type of deck.

Of course, if there's some way to recycle this card... Naruto/Jiraiya squad anybody?

-Josh

Labels: Fangs of the Snake, josh, previews

So today's card's name appears to have come straight from the Bandai Battle Spirits Flavor Text Translation Department HQ.

Honestly... "Water Pistol?" Really? Well, I guess Gamatatsu is pretty pathetic...

Luckily, the card itself is better than the name and I see this as inheriting Paper Bomb's spot in an aggressive Lightning deck with Toads (not the combo Gamabunta one, although it certainly could fit in there as well). There certainly is some sick blowout potential with the card - opponent looks to chump block with a team slightly smaller than your own, you Pistol their 2/3 Hinata out of their team, and all of a sudden it's a pseudo-OV (assuming you've got the combination ninja).

Of course, that's the optimal situation - this card has plenty of other uses. Obviously, it can be used to push for BRs (as well as killing an injured chump blocker, significantly reducing the value the opponent thought they would be getting out of it). It can be used as a pseudo-Wind Scythe for negation purposes (that could possibly be more devastating depending on how the battling teams are arranged).

However, all this depends on if more good early game (T3 and less) ninja toads are printed. The 4/0 0 drop and 0/2 1 drop are perfectly legit to play. The reprinted 0/0 one is highly suspect in anything but a Gamabunta deck (although I am a fan of dropping Giant Ninja Toads into play on turn 2). With only 2 outs for actually playing this card, it's not particularly viable as it can't be reliably played in the early game. If Bandai were to print 2 or more early game ninja toads, this card could be a staple of the post-rotation metagame.

-Josh

Labels: Fangs of the Snake, josh, previews